In Memory

My father, Graham.
Died~ Wednesday 28th October, 2009.

I tremble and cry out…my eyes flood;
blue eyes that he gave me.
My heart bleeds and soul writhes.
A musician, a father, a husband…
but not a sheep.
His name is not written…
He never believed in the red letters.

Yet how much more does the Father ache?
To turn his gaze away.
To say ‘I never knew him…’

To know that His judgement is righteous.

‘Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man. For God shall bring every work into judgment, with every secret thing, whether it be good, or whether it be evil’- Ecclesiastes 13b-14

Ten on Tuesday

I’ve never done a ‘ten on Tuesday’ before. I may not ever again. But Crystals blog inspired me, so here it is.

-I am so close to freedom. Im not talking about an ideological or theological sense…but free from study and books. Just 4000 words and a pleasing grade between me…and ‘it’.

-I’ve been thinking about how weird I am lately. I think Im really weird. Late at night I come up with crazy ideas. Like virtual marketing. Or baking novelty cakes with harmless body cell waste.

-My best friend…well, old best friend, is finally moving back from London. When I moved back from living in Idaho, she moved to London 3 months later. When she visited Australia, we went to Indonesia. Now that she’s moving back Im wondering if this is our cue to move overseas…you know, because I like patterns even if they make no sense.

-Jayde shaved suds (and skin) off her upperlip yesterday in the bath. FYI, I don’t do this, so I don’t know where she got the idea. We just heard the yell and saw the blood. But when I told her she might grow a moustache she started crying and said ‘I’ll never get married now’. I felt like my heart was black. Very black.

- Most of the time I am reconciled to having celiac disease. What I really don’t like is people thinking it’s a ‘diet’ and offering me wheat/oat/rye/barley loaded foods. Its not just about not eating gluten….its an autoimmune disorder. I get sick and fatigued and my bone density is that of a 46 year old woman. Its not worth it!

- Jack and Jayde had hair cuts yesterday. So hot right now.

- When I commented on Terah’s blog today the comment verification box said ‘lober’. I took this as a subliminal message that blogger thinks Im a loser. I mentally retaliated that blogger without the ‘l’ is bogger…slang for toilet. Then I realised I was having an imaginary conflict with a social computing tool and that the social computing tool was right.

- Do all Americans eat with their fork in their right hand and knife in their left hand, or is this just a regional/in-law family thing? I’m not a snob but cross-cultural table manners result in some icy stares at our dinner table.

- I played my first game of netball since 6th grade last week. It was awesome. I love my team and surprised myself. Then I went home and ate chocolate.

- I want to learn how to play the didgeridoo…but Im afraid of failure.

Chalk & Cheese

Sweet and sour.

A dreamer and a determined one.

One creative, one destructive.

One carefree, one calculating.

One lost in an imaginary world, one firmly anchored in realism.

One spontaneous, one meticulous.

A girl who is too happy to fuss, and a boy who cares so very deeply.

I know I shouldnt compare.

But sometimes, on the same day, in the same place....

I see them.

Like two different sides of the same scene.

Both needed.

Both beautiful.

Both devoted to each other.

Both embedded in my heart.

I wouldnt change a thing.

My cup overflows!

When She Was Five....

I was looking through the archives and found this from last June. My 5 year old girl.

She's now 7. New teeth. Darker hair. Sweeter smile. Wiser eyes. Selflessly impractical, frustratingly patient, goofy as ever...a gift so precious I can hardly breathe.

I cant bear the thought of it continuing...this 'growing up'. But I couldnt bear the thought of it not continuing either. Where has the time gone? Why has it gone so fast? What a chastizement to cherish each moment and each day.....

Oh God, please give me wisdom and patience and grace! Help us raise our children to know and love you. Have them bear good fruit. Amen.

A favour...

I'm hoping that those of you who read my blog from time to time might do me a little favour.

As part of one of my classes I have to design different eLearning tools (blogs, wikis, virtual classrooms etc) and I have finished creating my blog example. If you have time, could you check it out at www.readingpics.blogspot.com and let me know what you think. It doesnt really matter about the content so much, just that the blog itself is functional etc.

Thanks much!
-k.

What else do you do...?

Jayde is in the middle of her 2 weeks of school holidays.

So far we've had....rain, rain, wind, hail, rain, hail, wind, wind, rain....pretty much just this kind of weather every.single.day. After teasing us with 2 months of hot, dry weather....its a cruel blow indeed. Did I mention I have five uni assignments due before the end of this month? And that the lack of an outdoors play area is umm...turning me into a desperate woman.

So what else do you do? After you've exhausted all the puzzles, board games, books, movies etc the kids can handle? When the only game they desire to play is to kamakaze bomb off the top of bunk beds and hope that they land on a beanbag? When all the negative ions outside have made them giddy and crazy and wild and unruly? When you break out in a gastly hairline stress rash and feel like hiding from your own children?

You let em sing.

To hear Jaydes efforts, test out the new music player :) I cant decide which one I like best...I know its slightly painful but still, its CUTE! Do it! (and seriously, can someone please try it out so that I know it doesnt just work in my browser?).

Ahhh. I know it may be unpolished. And pipey. And warbley. But to a mothers ears...its so sweet.

Maybe even just a small taste of what God must feel as we sing our praises to Him.

:)

Bug head

Jack loves bugs. I hear he always has and Im guessing he always will.

We live with 'insect-injections' in most conversations; the random trivia he knows about insects would put most entomologists to shame.

And while some of us are off creating useful posts about castles and pirates and maidens....and admiring scenery and having (bug-free) conversations....Jack will be scouring the dirt...watching ants, gazing at slugs and quietly snapping away with the camera. We must look like an odd family. A very, odd, family.

But with shots like these, I guess I can put up with all the mantismania a little longer.